TOO BUSY FOR ROMANCE?

Happy Sunday morning! I’m sitting here dressed but I have my pajama top over my blouse since I got chilly. I’m going to address this blog to a friend who emailed me a question, since we can all relate to it.

Hi Melanie,

I hope you’re doing great as things get closer and closer to that wonderful day of the year that we love.

You asked, “After a day of volunteer work or any other work, how would I enter or come to the Living Romance? I do not want to miss out on the Romance.”

Last Wednesday my sister-in-law, my sister, and I drove an hour away for “big fun” as we shopped Jungle Jim’s (the largest grocery store in the world, as far as I know) and thrift stores. We had a total blast shopping, of course, but more than that was our time together as we laughed and talked. Now, in the future, we’ll be saying, “Remember that Hot Fried Pies café we ate at, it was amazing! Who would think a pineapple fried pie could be so good? We need to go back there.” And they’ll know what I’m talking about, because they were a part of that. Or, “Remember that beautiful scarf we all wanted but it was $45.00?” We’re close friends because we do things together, which gives us a way to relate to each other.

The Romance grows out of your time alone with Jesus. It really boils down to that. My sister refers to it as “time in your secret garden with Him.” When it comes to your working, whether volunteer, a job, or even being really busy with other things (like I take care of my mom as she’s handicapped), it still boils down to the same thing—spending time with Jesus. Now, that doesn’t have to be a long time, even ten minutes a day is better than none, but you’ll not get to know him unless you spend time with him, and the Romance is born out of that.

Because you’re getting to know Him during that time you’ll experience the “romance” then throughout your day, sensing his presence, hearing his voice, feeling him holding you, but you still have to “stop, look, and listen,” (as if you were crossing the train track, lol). Because being with him is where you learn to use your spiritual senses that will then allow you to experience him. You can’t learn to experience him during your day until you learn to hear him and see him and feel him during your close time. And because we’re in a physical body and living in a physical world, you have to develop that awareness that is always tuned in to him. Here’s the thing about being together just to get to know each other—you’re building memories with him, a history together. It has to be at a time set aside for just that, not during your reading-your-Bible-time or devotional-time or worshipping-time, just to be alone with him so you can get to know each other.

Of course, on the days you’re busy with life it’s hard, I totally understand that and to be honest I struggle with having that time too. Some people have their time at the beginning of their day, others at the end. It really depends on what works best for you. I like to have my time with him in the evening close to bedtime, when I can relax and lean my head back without worrying about messing up my hair. In the morning it’s really hard for me to sit still, I’m full of energy and raring to go! But because I’ve put so much time into my relationship and being with him, even when I don’t make the time I’m experiencing him throughout my day.

I talked about my shopping trip earlier this week. To have a relationship with someone you have to make memories, create a history with them. Then, as you’re together, you have things to talk about, you know them, plus you can say, “Remember that time … “ or “You once said … “ or whatever, like a joke that’s just between the two of you. I can say to Jesus, “Yeah, uh-huh, I know how you feel about McDonalds,” and we’ll both laugh. Because that memory is about him and me together. We have a history, meaning, a relationship.

Again, the hard part is making that time. It’s not a religious discipline that you have to do EVERY DAY or you’re a failure. He’s not judging you if you go a stretch without making the time. It’s not like that. He loves you fiercely and he can’t wait to be with you, but he was human and he also understands how “life” is. Yet, if you want the romance you need to make time for him, no matter what else is going on in your life. “Life” will be there no matter what you’re doing. You will always be tired at the end of the day, whether you were shopping and hanging out with friends or volunteering or working your job. It’s always a choice.

Here’s what will help that. Ask Jesus often to give you a passion for him. Tell him you want to be so in love with him that you can’t stay away. He loves to answer that prayer!

Keep me posted on how it’s going and feel free to ask questions. :)

Brenda